Recovery from breast cancer takes time and patience. It cannot be rushed or forced. Learn these helpful coping and re-entry mechanisms from The Silver Lining: A Supportive & Insightful Guide to Breast Cancer.
• Make sure that you have a complete, detailed medical record, including cancer diagnosis, every test and the results, surgery hospital notes, all treatments and their side effects, complementary treatments and effects, and clinical trial title and number (if you participated). Be as specific as possible and include dates.
• Grief during and after breast cancer (or any other earth-shattering event) is normal and dynamic, pervasive and individual. I don’t think that I have (I know that I haven’t) fully gone through the grieving process… and still have some work to do.
• Returning to your regularly scheduled program is not an option. Like it or not, life is forever changed. Be open to the possibility and Silver Linings that this change can bring.
• Chemo can be pretty devastating to veins, so whenever you have your blood drawn, request a butterfly needle.
• Recovery is the time to decrease or eliminate any drug dependency that you may have developed during treatment, such as on sleeping pills.
• “How are you?” is a very loaded question. Take a deep breath before you answer. Regaining equilibrium in relationships is an ongoing process.
• Making long-term plans becomes feasible after time.
• Honor the feelings and let them out. Prior to my experience with breast cancer, I was a grin-and-bear-it kind of girl who was reluctant to share any feeling other than joy. However, once ’roid rage (the intense feelings of anger brought on by pre-chemotherapy steroids) and Chemo Sobby (tears at the drop of a hat brought on by the chemo drugs) entered my life, I had no choice but to let it all out. And you know what? Expressing feelings, all feelings, happens to feel good. Really good. Though I no longer have either ’roid rage or Chemo Sobby (thank goodness!), I continue to openly express my feelings. And it still feels good!
• Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. It took a cancer diagnosis for me to really get the meaning of this. I now know that seeking support is both the loving and strong thing to do. By getting the right help, whether in making decisions or making meals, I came to realize that letting go of control and delegating is a way to honor yourself and to honor those around you.
• Stop should-ing. Instead of should-ing on myself by guiltily responding to obligation, I now make decisions based on whether it will make my heart sing. That is a great Silver Lining!
• Now is the time to schedule regular check-ups (e.g., dentist, internist, gynecologist) to determine your new baseline.
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